Day Six

Sorry about yesterday. I just don’t know where the time goes. I just had a lot going on. Maybe if I tell you about my busy day, you’ll forgive me.

We are always up at first light it would seem. First, I hear Bella and Joy prancing about and cleaning their teeth (not sure who’s doing which because of the towel over my crate). Then after that I get let out. Bella usually tries to mug me, but I have perfected a special dance, that not only avoids Bella, but indicates (and I think in a graceful and dignified manner) that I am happy to see everyone. There’s little point being cavalier, and the dance does not involve wiggling or bending. Joy is an appreciative audience.

Then it’s off to the park behind the apartment building where we live. This is a shortish walk, just to take care of business as they say, and Joy and Bella and I are all in a hurry to get back because we know Claire will have fixed breakfast.

This morning it was STEAK. I kid you not. RIB EYE! I have heard about it, but never sampled it before, and let me tell ya, it sure beats Purina!

Bella and I take a postprandial snooze on the couch while the humans futz about  (goodness knows they like doing that), then Claire takes us out for the Ball Walk, which is the high point of Bella’s day. It is quite amusing to see her turn herself inside out for that thing – to the point of squealing! And here’s the thing – I’ve been thinking since I came that they were torturing her somehow – that she HAD to race after that ball as a punishment!

After the ball walk, it’s nap time again, till lunch, which Joy fixed – small, but elegant – just two square inches of salmon skin – but beautifully cooked and presented (Bella and I have matching green bowls). Then there was ad hoc activity (such as barking at the bull terriers in the park until made to stop), but nothing substantial until the Big Walk around 3pm.

The Big Walk varies. Today the four of us went to the UBC fields. Bella got in trouble for eating goose poop, but I was a good girl (apparently). We went into a tennis court and they let me Off, and you know, it’s funny. When I am On the leash I think that all I want is to be Off, but when I’m Off, it feels strangely scary. I run away from them, then I zoom back. As I run away, I feel exhilarated for a while, but then I need to turn around. It is an existentialist dilemma.

Anyway, instead of going straight back home yesterday after the walk, we went SHOPPING (to which I have never before been). I LIKE it (apart from the jingly door bell and the weird guy).

They bought me clothes.

These clothes are my very own and not to be worn by other dogs. My clothes are a very warm and snuggly Elvis jacket.

Look…

As you can see it has a big shiny lightning bolt on it, which is a magical protective  device my mums instructed the weird guy to sew into my coat to ward off evil spirits, ill-behaved canines, and nasty stupids.

How thoughtful.

My clothes are very warm too. I have stopped shivering.

Well.

After the SHOPPING, there was home, and dinner and couch, and goodness me, one would think that was enough but no…

There was a FULL BODY MASSAGE!!!

You know I have ISSUES and many of them are about being touched. Here is a list of my issues:

1. Do not like being held by collar
2. Do not like being approached
3. Do not like being touched anywhere but especially on neck, top of head, paws, or tail
4. Do not like having mouth looked inside
5. Do not like hands touching me where I cannot see them
6. Do not like any sudden movements
7. DO NOT LIKE BEING PICKED UP!!!!

Well, there it was. One minute I was dozing next to Claire and the next minute, she had scooped me up, turned me upside down, and set me on her knee before I could say DON’T MESS WITH IZZY!!!

I froze.

Then there was tickling.

And then there was the FULL BODY MASSAGE.

It is a little embarrassing to talk about…the acupawpressure, and the ear rubbing, the shitzu massage of the legs, the muzzle therapy.

I stopped worrying and just shut my eyes and enjoyed it.

You should try it sometime.

Look. Here I am in the spa (and no my mouth is NOT open).

Well.

That was my day.

Must go. They are calling me for bed time.